Friday night, and I’m grocery shopping, cooking and cleaning. This is why I didn’t get married, so I wasn’t stuck in the kitchen. Well, that and nobody asked. I consider it a bullet dodged.

But as a single women in the prime of her….fifties…I should be at the disco on a Friday night. I should be in my best polyester dress, dancing the “Bump” and the “Hustle”, letting guys in tight white suits buy me cocktails. Um, do discos exist anymore? And is it okay if I wear handsome, but sensible shoes?

I saw the naturopath, Dr. Paul, this afternoon to check on my detox diet. He decided it was time to start adding things in, one at a time, to see how I react to them. I suggested butter. And donuts. Buttered donuts. He thought not. I offered to leg wrestle him for it, but he declined (chicken). We settled on cheeses, which made me very happy. You know I love cheeses!

I’m to binge on cheese for a day and then go two days without it. I’ll then need to take note of any changes in how I feel. I decided my day of the cheese binge would start immediately and go into Saturday. Half a bag of curds later, I still feel great! Well, it kind of feels like someone is pulling all the skin on my head into a tight knot between my eyes. My burning, watery eyes. And my nose is running. But really, I feel great, nothing to see here folks, move along, move along.

Sigh. It’s not looking good for cheeses.

After I detox some more, I get to try eggs. If eggs are out….Damn. Now I’m afraid to even try the buttered donuts.

Stay tuned…